Bulletin Board description/ explanation
Funny Animals Doing Weird Things
by Imran Shah
Read by Tim House
One day in Australia, I was sitting on the park bench and feeling lonely. I saw a puppy. He was a small, little puppy named Bobby. Bobby hugged me and whispered in my ear, “Do you want a taco?”
I said, “Yes!”
Then a black cat named Paws came up to me and said, “Do you want to get a donut?” I said yes. So first we went to Taco Bell and got tacos, but the cat refused to eat her taco, so then we went to Dunkin’ Donuts like the cat wanted. But Bobby didn’t eat his donut.
Then Bobby shouted in my ear, “WHY DID WE HAVE TO COME HERE!!!” in a funny voice. “I HATE DONUTS!”
I said, “We came here because Paws wanted to. Isn’t that right, Paws? Paws?... PAWS?... Where are you?!”
Illustration by Imran Shah
Paws had left to go find more food. A family saw Paws walking down the street, and decided to adopt her.
Paws lived with that family for nine years! After nine years, Paws decided to sneak out the door, because she felt like the family needed to pay more attention to one another instead of her. But she left the screen door open with the doorstop.
A different black cat named Whiskers came through the door. When the family came home, they thought it was Paws, because they looked so similar!
When Paws left the family, she lived on the streets. People gave her lots of yummy food that she always finished.
Twenty years later, I was still searching for Paws. Bobby was still living with me.
One day, I thought I found Paws on the sidewalk, just like before! “I finally found you, Paws!”
“I’m not Paws! I’m a dog! My name is Tom!” Tom was a chihuahua who looked like a cat.
After five more years, I was still searching for Paws. One day, I went into Dunkin’ Donuts, and I saw Paws eating all of the donuts! She had scared away the employees with her sharp fangs.
“I finally found you, Paws! Wait, are you Paws, the cat that went to Dunkin’ Donuts with me 25 years ago?” I said.
“Well, duh, who do you think I am? A Nyan Cat that went to Dunkin’ Donuts with you?” said Paws. I felt happy that I found Paws.
Then Paws and I went to the zoo. We found a giraffe eating popcorn.
Paws asked the giraffe, “Why are you eating popcorn?”
The giraffe said, “Don’t judge me for eating popcorn!”
Then I saw a kitty who lived in the cage with the giraffe doing a funny dance. I laughed a lot. Then, I saw Paws running away! I was watching the kitty do the funny dance, so I didn’t care at the moment.
Paws ran to the lion’s cage, jumped over the fence, and started living with the lion! I thought, Well that’s just rude. How dare you, Paws! Well, I don’t care anymore.
I drove back to my house and I saw a puppy at the door. The puppy, whose name was Dino, hugged me.
I said to Dino, “Who are you? Why are you doing this?”
Dino responded, “You are mine now!” in a cute and scary puppy voice. I thought this was creepy and funny at the same time, but mostly funny.
Then I left to go to the grocery store because what Dino said to me kind of creeped me out and I had to go somewhere to get away.
I bought some stuff at the store. I bought chips, candy, soda, cake, ice cream, and cookies. I only bought this stuff because I’m really unhealthy.
When I paid for the stuff and left the store, Dino was right outside! It turns out Dino had followed me to the store and was waiting outside for me for the whole time. He looked like he was giving me the death stare, saying again, “You’re mine now.”
What does ‘You’re mine now’ even mean? I thought to myself. I got too scared, so I went back home. Dino was so small that he had quietly climbed into the trunk of my car, closed the door, and started eating all my snacks on the ride home! When we got to my house, Dino climbed out of the trunk very quietly and ran to my door and unlocked it with his sharp little claws.
When I opened my front door, I saw Dino again! I said to him, “Why are you here?”
He said ‘Because I just want to be your friend!”
I ran out of the house and said, “No you’re still too scary!” I didn’t want to be Dino’s friend, because all of my animal friends kept leaving, and I thought Dino might leave one day too.
Illustration by Imran Shah
After I ran away, Dino got sad and started crying. I went to hide by a nearby pond. I hid behind the bushes. Then, I saw two turtles playing with each other! One of the turtles was flipped on its back, and the other turtle was tickling it! It looked like the turtles were having a lot of fun. I thought, Hmm… what if I also want to have fun?
I ran back to my house and saw that Dino was still there, and still crying! I said to him, “Fine Dino, I will be your friend!” Dino was happy because he finally had a new friend.
Then, all the animals that I had met throughout the years looked me up on social media. They saw that I had been feeling sad and lonely. The animals found my address on the internet and came to my house and surprised me! We had a nice, happy party! We ate a chocolate cake with 400 billion layers and strawberry and chocolate ice cream with lots of cherries and 100 billion sprinkles. I didn’t feel lonely anymore.
After the party, I asked Dino if he had a job. Dino said, “Yes I do.”
I said, “What is it?”
“I work as a secret government agent.”
Imran is 7 years old.